Thankful that my Mama don’t have to spend Thanksgiving in shitty ass Albuquerque, but instead Sunny LA with My two brothers. I can’t go because the man wouldn’t let a brotha get time off, but she’s super excited so i’m happy.
Thankful that I get to spend Thanksgiving with The Hawthornes, yet again. They ARE my fam and we are gonna put our collective feet into this Thanksgiving from the 5th Man Turkey made my me and Alex and Jessica giving Old Grandmas a run for they money on them greens.
Thankful Avery took care of me with her Doc McStuffin doctor kit when I was sick. She’s the most amazing, loving little girl on earth. She’ll just beam when she sees uncle and I turn to mush when she’s just coloring and out of nowhere says “I love you uncle”. I’m bout to cry right damn now thinking about it, but I won’t cause I’m listening to that new D.R.A.M and can’t be crying bumpin Broccoli!
Thankful Big Nate, AKA, He-Man Hawthorne let’s me hold him and throws the ball with me. He’s the coolest one year old in the game.
Thankful that I’m still invited to the Rubios house for Thanksgiving, Christmas or just to stop by and say hello. I’ve been knowing them since we moved to AZ in ’97. I get Tamales even if I didn’t help make them and we all know that doesn’t happen, like EVER! U don’t help, u don’t eat! Mr. and Mrs. Rubio is how I wanna be when I get married! They’re proof that marriage can be fun.
Thankful for having a dad that’s cool with having ridiculous kids who do and like dumb stuff. He’s the best because no matter what we wanna do, as long as it’s positive and constructive he’ll help out in any way possible.
Thankful for having a Mom who’s is the most passionate person i’ve ever met. She keeps me in the know on whatever brotha who plays guitar she’s in love with, cat videos and all the Native info I need. I also see where we all get our love of absurd humor and pettiness from. She’ll text me just to say how much she hates the Colts on tuesday. She’s the most loving lady and the world should be thankful Kathleen Johnson is in the world.
Thankful for having two talented brothers who are doing some pretty bad ass stuff in Comedy and Journalism.
Thankful for having friends and family back in Indy who’s always around and ready to hang out, have fun and reminisce on all types of craziness.
Thankful for my Montana punk rock friends who are the coolest cats a brotha could ask for. When I saw everyone a few weeks ago, it was like we hang out everyday, nothing changed. That’s the dope friendships.
Thankful for all my friends in AZ for somehow still thinking I’m pretty dope.
Thankful I found my way out of that shitty depression that was messin up my existence for so long and can finally see and feel what true happiness feels like.
That was kinda real spit from ya boy, but now I gotta talk about the other stuff that I’m thankful for.
- That new D.R.A.M album Big Baby Dram. Best album of the year!
- The Weeknd cutting that old dirty twist mop off his dome.
- Bruno Mars finding out he likes Morris Day and Ready for the World cause his new album bangs!
- Not having to deal with racist and stupid family members like a bunch of yall this Thanksgiving
- My new favorite Podcast Still Processing with Wesley Morris and Jenna Wortham of the New York Times.
- New Ryan Adams Music on the Horizon!
- Being able to wear shorts and go swimming on Thanksgiving if i damn well please.
- Talking to a gal who doesn’t have the personality of a rusty basement nail.
- Not having listened to that Frank Ocean Album.
- Moonlight getting so much shine! It’s a dope movie, go see it dammit!
- Baseball being over and College Basketball Starting! Go Duke!
- Seinfeld being on Hulu.
- Shows like Insecure, Black’ish and Atlanta being on television.
- The new John Mayer song Love on the Weekend
- Having two places to go stuff my face for Thanksgiving #AllThePlates
- Watching THREE football games tomorrow!
- Not having to work Black friday, or as Target and Walmart call it now, come get these shitty 40 inch tv’s and fight over the last 20 dollar blender Thursday.
- Not buying cheap toilet paper anymore! #GameChanger
- Having reasons to head back to Montana for a visit! Even if they have weird brewery laws, but whatevs.
- Having a friend in Clovis where we can just quote Boyz in the Hood all day long!
- queso dip on a hamburger
- Finding out my mama is leaving the hell hole that is Albuquerque and moving to Vegas!
- Knowing I still won’t watch A Christmas Story this year.
- Having a black barber up the street from the pad.
- Not being a vegan during the holidays.
- Babies just saying Hi for no reason!
- Happy hours that aren’t just a dollar off pints. That’s bush league!
- The Big Round Orange Head joke…Look it up!
- Knowing deep in my soul that Sausage is better than bacon!
- Farting in public and blaming it on the kids who walked past.
- Having the plug for a dope potato salad recipe.
- Knowing I’m so close to one day fulfilling my life’s goal of meeting Mary Holland, Alice Wetterlund and Camille Smura!
- Knowing I’m the greatest Dominoes player not in Cuba! Come see me!
- My friends putting up with a wierdo, petty ridiculous brotha after all these years.